I know there are many hurting in this page with grief. This is what I wrote about my uncle passing last year and my beautiful experience with my bloodline that day. Sharing in case it helps anyone.
Yesterday my uncle died 7 months before reaching 100 years old. He was an amazing man and lived fully as a world war 2 hero and professional soccer player. My kids loved listening to his stories.
He moved to Canada so I only met him in adulthood when he moved back and it was the first time I met someone who was like my Mom, because she lost the rest of her family before I was born.
Meeting him was like ‘ooohhh that’s who I am/we are’. Family is so connected whether we know them a short or long time, or we never met them.
He was the last person alive who knew my Mom’s Mom and Dad who died when she was young, and also her own brother who died at ten years old.
The ability to talk about her memories with anyone who also remembers them was fun for her, so she is kinda saying goodbye to them all again today.
I have always been able to feel this grief in her. She has a permanent ‘side of sad’ alongside all of her experiences. She coexists with it, for some periods in my life it took her over, but more recently it has softened. She will be able to navigate this now because she is stronger.
You know what’s true for me though today? This “beautiful sad” feeling.
When I channel my bloodline on that side right now they are all happy and peaceful and sending so much love to us right now because they know we will miss him.
It’s a really powerful love that is sad and makes me want to cry all the time, but it is truly so beautiful.
I can zoom in on how her brother who died at ten feels ..(my uncle) he’s still youthful and innocent feeling and so joyful and loving.
Feeling her mom’s flood of love makes me ball crying because it would have been amazing to know her and get that love from an in person hug. The grandma I never met, but she is sending her love to me today.
Her dad is, even in death, a man of few words and I get that vibe but also a peace about him, and a gentleness towards me.
And now my great uncle is back with everyone and it feels much more complete there somehow. They are happy to have him.
Being able to connect to their love whenever I want is powerful. It feels comforting that it exists as a permanent force, even though they are not here and even though I never met them.
I can feel the duality of their feeling complete and being happy to have him, as well as their sending so much love for us because they know we are sad.
I was told a while ago that I could access the medium realm “if I want to”. I guess today I want to.
It has been truly beautiful. Even though I can’t stop crying. ???