Front-row seat to the universe

Front-row seat to the universe

I’m basking in my front-row seat to the universe right now during a night flight on a clear night.
 
I have always loved looking at the stars. The depth and expansiveness instantly shift my perspective from whatever earthly thing I was worried about – to wonder, awe, and a knowing that we are loved and supported here with our trials.
 
The trials that are both huge and feel hard will soon pass and turn into growth, wisdom, and memories, ultimately leading to more magical moments.
 
The stars lovingly remind me that each moment is short and magical, and therefore being present to it – the magical right now – is everything.
 
 

Mindfulness – focusing on the right now while using your senses, is something I have been practicing personally for decades. I even teach it, yet my ADHD busy mom brain can easily loop into task-lists and fear thoughts, replacing my feelings of safety and truth with angst.
 
With this awareness, though, I can follow my breath, use my senses to focus back on the current typically manageable moment.
 
I feel so grateful to be blessed with the clear sky on my night flight, so the stars can gently remind me to get out of my head and enjoy the magical and peaceful now.
 
Back the energy of knowing the truth, Divine support, and love.
Gonna go back and stare out of the window for the remainder of the trip, but I wanted to share – hopeful the stars will have reminded one of you beauties to breathe and take a moment as well.
 
Love you guys,
Joanna Peters
Intuitive coach, author, and stargazer.
❤️❤️????❤️❤️

 

would you like to be validated and inspired by other women who have walked through hard seasons?

In my book “A Woman’s Word”, you will get a first-hand account of 9 brave women courageously rebuilding their lives in every sense after walking through some of the hardest things that humanity has to endure – you will fall in love with, identify with, and root for these real women.  

By reading A Women’s Word readers are sure to be inspired and encouraged.  Joanna eloquently shares deeply heroic, empowering stories. I have to tell you—when I got to the last line, I cheered out loud! – Elizabeth D, Editor Balboa Press. 

what if you aren’t lacking patience, but boundaries?

what if you aren’t lacking patience, but boundaries?

When my kids were little, I tried so hard to have patience. Everyone would tell me how patient I was, but they weren’t around at that moment when I lost it. That moment where my head would start to spin and I was outside of my body watching, as this lady I barely recognized yelled and screeched things at my precious babies.

 Five minutes before that scene, I would be overtired and resentful for all the times they pushed my boundaries that day, yet I would still be trying to keep a patient and fun tone with them.

 Then later would come the shame attack. When they were in bed and resembling angels again, my mean voice would take over: “I blew it – we had such a lovely day and this is how it had to end” …the mean voice wasn’t finished…. “They are only little for a short while; I need to have more patience!.”

 Observing me with my children around that time, my Mum lovingly brought to my attention that I had it backward: “Jo, you don’t need to be more patient, you need to be LESS patient!”. I wasn’t clear yet what that would look like.

I want to share my lessons in being “overly patient,” especially during this time when so many families are cooped up together and moms everywhere are understandably losing it and feeling bad.

When my kids were small, I was missing an extremely important element to my parenting – that I matter too.

When I remember that I matter too, I monitor my own happiness throughout the day, as closely as I do my children’s, and I speak up about my needs before I turn into an overtired and resentful version of myself.

 

Here’s the personal check-in concept that helps me around patience:

Feeling resentment and anger usually means I need to review my boundaries.

  • What did I want to say “no” to and said “yes” to instead?
  • Who need I need to speak up to?

For me, this included cutting off their playtime when I was tired, saying “no” to the extra game of tumble purely because I was finding it annoying (and that was okay!), and stepping up my parenting to include immediate consequences for whining.

Saying “no” to my kids more meant I had to energy to say “yes” to myself in other ways, like having the clarity of mind to make healthier food choices, or choose a 5-minute meditation in the bathroom. All of which served to keep everyone happier.

The other key I learned to not becoming resentful and angry was taking care of my physical, emotional and spiritual needs during the day, too (for more on that click here). 

I got a handle on speaking up about my boundaries when my kids were little, and I’m so glad I did because it was a necessary warmup for the teen years. Not only do I need to remember that I matter, but I have to guard my personal boundaries like my sanity depends on it, because it very much does!

I think we all get that one child – the one who makes you earn your mommy badge. The pre-teen version of mine, perhaps a lawyer in training, would ask repeatedly and in multiple ways for whatever thing he was hyper focused on that day.

 I would say “no” and explain “why,” – then say “no,” and explain “why” again. Then later say “still no” and “here’s why.” It was exhausting. He wanted what he wanted, regardless of the words coming out of my mouth.

 At times I felt bullied by his persistence, and my tone would switch to annoyed and defensive, and then I would lose my patience. Then I would feel bad.

 Thankfully with age comes wisdom and healing. It didn’t take many rounds of this for me to remember that feeling angry and resentful was my personal indicator that I needed a boundaries recheck. I matter too, and this behavior was not OK.

 The problem was that I was being overly patient with his bad behavior.

 So, I set a new boundary around this behavior and a consequence. If he asked me something more than once, and I felt I had provided an adequate explanation, he lost his phone immediately.

 He still loses his phone a lot. I even choose to be a little amused by it. I admire his persistence; it will serve him well one day.

 He does not, however, get to rob my peace with his antics. I set that boundary and I guard it fiercely. While he stomps around phoneless in his room, I am sipping my coffee in peace, self-reflecting on a job well done.

So, to my fellow peacekeeping, overly patient, people-pleasers out there, may this be a reminder to establish your boundaries and/or recommit to them with all the people in your life, especially in these hard times.

If would also encourage you to take the Exhaustion Matrix Quiz below, to reveal which other personal traits are creating unnecessary stress in your life. In addition to your detail personal report, you will receive additional tips and tools to help you work back to a state of ‘flow’ in your life. 

Sending so much love,

Joanna Peters, Coach & Author: Guiding soul weary women to heal from their painful pasts, shed shame and finally live with the peace and self-love they deserve.

 

Originally posted on The MOPS Blog

I Matter, Too

 

    do you know what is causing your personal exhaustion?

    If you want to gain a complete picture of what inner traits are draining you the most right now take my signature Quiz.

    After the 2 minute quiz, I will send you more goodies tailored to the top three causes for your exhaustion, including a personalized report.

    The Fire Isn’t the End of the Story

    The Fire Isn’t the End of the Story

    I watched “Forests” by Our Planet on Netflix last night. I was mesmerized as I watched the incredibly detailed connection and dependency between species and plants work beautifully.

    I then saw it get brutally wiped out by fire and human indifference or carelessness.

    But guess what guys, that wasn’t the end of the story. I saw it regrow, heal and repopulate often in new ways.

    Some plants can’t exist in the forest without the fire that came before it.

    Even Chernobyl has been re-vegetated and populated to the food chain level of wolves now.

    More than just a metaphor, it’s an accurate reflection of what happens in our heart and soul after loss and hurt.

    Which make sense, since we have the same loving powerful creator and we are His (Her/It’s) most prize creation.

    Most prize creation – hard to internalize after you watch the beauty and miracles in all of nature, but we are so loved and supported.

    We can’t possibly comprehend the ‘why’s or the ‘how’s of life in our brains, but we do have the capacity to learn to love ourselves as much as we are loved, and trust that it’s okay to not know how it’s all going to come together.

    God has the power to take care of the rest.

    Maybe we aren’t yet where we want to be, or who we want to be; we may be uncomfortable or it may feel like everything is being burned to the ground around us.

    But it isn’t the end of the story yet guys.

    Little miracles happen around us all day every day.

    Unlike the plants though, we have free will, so we do need to ask for help.
    We need to say “Please help me” or “Show me how to feel more peace and trust”.

    Then we need to create the silence in our lives to listen and surrender and learn and heal.

    We will regrow, heal and come back a wiser and more resilient version of ourselves; but the real win will be if we also learn to love ourselves harder, if we step closer to Source and surrender a little, perhaps even learn how to reach for and claim moments of peace.

    The fire isn’t the end of the story. Ask and receive, and watch the miracles happen ???