How to know when you need to step up your boundaries game.

Did you know that many women equate saying ‘no’ with ‘I don’t care about you’?

If you struggle with speaking up about what you want, often feeling like your relationships are not reciprocal, you are not alone, my friend! That big old heart of yours is playing tricks on you, and as a recovering people pleaser – I’ve got you.

Boundaries are either taught to you, and you are encouraged to use them growing up, or – like me, you reach exhaustion at some point and start researching what you are doing wrong!

When you don’t set healthy boundaries, you are at the mercy of others – how much they ask of you, what makes them happy – you are letting someone else decides how you feel or should act.

You may tell yourself that this is “okay” for a while, but you are human, and your soul will become lost, disappointed, sad, and more resentful the longer this continues.

Boundaries are a good thing!!

They are not about telling others that you don’t care about them or being selfish or mean.

They are how you define your relationship with YOURSELF.

They help honor YOUR needs, feelings, and values.

What is important to you matters. Who will represent and protect those essential personal needs, if not yourself?

Boundaries, when used well, protect your joy and conserve your energy. They make you a better version of yourself, which benefits everyone you are in a relationship with too!

The first important step in setting boundaries is learning more about yourself – your true self.

Letting go of, perhaps, the version of you that others have needed or wanted you to be in the past.

For example:

If you were praised in the past for helping people, maybe you do that often, and it does make you happy – until it doesn’t, because you need your own space to recharge sometimes too.

There is no right or wrong with boundary setting. You make the rules and get to decide how people treat you, how they behave around you and what they can expect from you.

If you have been running on empty like me and suspect you need to step up your boundary game, the next step is to uncover what is behind the exhausted feeling. When left unchecked, many inner traits exacerbate the hard things we are going through.  

I invite you to take my 2-minute quiz below to identify what your Exhaustion Archetype is; I will explain how the shadow aspect of your archetype may be draining you and will send you free tools on how to create the life you want, personalized to your results.

You matter! 

Sending so much love,

Joanna Peters, Coach & Author: Guiding soul weary women to heal from their painful pasts, shed shame and finally live with the peace and self-love they deserve.