One of the most healing experiences I personally experienced, after many years of different types of talk therapy, was spiritual inner child work. I love sharing this modality with others, to other healers and individuals looking to heal in a deeper way.
What is the ‘Inner Child’?
The ‘Inner child’ refers to that part of us that we can connect with, the girl version of ourselves inside, who likes to play and feel loved. It is also where we store our childhood wounds in our bodies energetically.
We can still feel that pain from our youth some days, or maybe it’s there but we are disconnected from feeling it; either way, our personal triggers are created from having that trapped emotion or energy in our body.
Spiritually, we still have the wounded inner child within us – split off, or frozen at the age when the difficult event happened that wounded us.
You may have a sad eight-year-old girl inside of you, because that’s the age when you moved away from your first family home. Or maybe you’re an abandoned ten-year-old girl that needs comfort from when your parents divorced, or perhaps you’re still angry about the divorce because you were never allowed the space to release it at that time.
For some, obviously the traumas were much harder. It doesn’t matter what the trauma was, just that it was significant enough to change how you feel about the world or yourself after that event.
Part of going through any spiritual awakening involves these childhood wounds coming up to be healed, whether you like it or not. You simply cannot increase your vibration significantly while carrying them.
Holding space for another human during the inner child revelation is beautiful, getting to be there for the big relief of a “a-ha!’ moment and feeling the joy and freedom that delivers for the person often brings tears to my eyes.
“Oh, so eight year old me felt she had to defend herself to feel safe! – I see it, and I’m still doing it!”
They see the world differently after that moment. It’s lighter and with more freedom.
How do I know that I have inner child wounds?
In short, most people do. Our parents are human and were doing their best with their personal unhealed wounds when they raised us.
We all have reactions to current events that are based upon our unhealed wounds. For example, if you have a tendency to feel defensive when criticized, it is likely that you are viewing the situation through your personal lens of life, which includes a childhood wound of feeling betrayed.
Of course, this happens in milliseconds and subconsciously, so you are not always aware this has happened to you. It feels super true in the moment that it’s the other person’s fault and they are attacking you.
That’s why the work is so important, because it brings to your consciousness what is actually driving your adult reactions, and once you have all the information, it gives you a chance to choose differently.
Will I feel any different if I do this?
With each memory, discovery, release and healing, you will feel lighter and closer to who you really are.
If emotionally disconnecting was your coping strategy to avoid the difficult feelings, then you will start to feel more connected to yourself. If you were using other ways to numb the difficult feelings (comfort eat, drink etc) these urges will gradually decrease.
It will start to create a small amount of space between your typical automatic reaction (reach for food, yell at someone etc). Enough space for you to make a different conscious choice of how you want to respond.
I used to be super disconnected, it was a strategy I picked up during my childhood so I wouldn’t feel any sadness or anger. But I learned that we can’t live our lives this way. We cannot cherry pick which emotions we disconnect from.
If you are disconnecting yourself from the pain of an unhealed past, you are disconnecting from joy too. Healing is the only way to radical self-acceptance and to a joy that grows with every layer healed.
Releasing the trapped energy is also beneficial by itself, chronic emotional and physical ailments are often caused by this trapped unhealed energy.
More on this beautiful healing modality:
When you connect with, listen to and nurture your inner child you can find and heal the energetic roots of your ‘issues’ as an adult.
This is a truly spiritual, sacred and rewarding experience.
Examples of inner child wounds that I have been honored to support clients through are from abandonment (perceived or actual), verbal, physical or sexual abuse, or fear of lack of something (such as food, money or a place to sleep).
Most abused children perceive that these events were their fault in some way. They feel responsible to effect change at the time but are unable to. They start the “I am not good enough—/I don’t matter” type of core self-beliefs that damage our self-esteem as adults and lead to anxiety and depression.
There is evidence that these types of wounds are linked to addiction, because the desire to numb the emotion pain with food or other substances is so strong.
Other types of wounds are caused by parents reprimanding their children for being children, “Stop crying, you are so sensitive, etc”. “I’m tired of you forgetting things, what is wrong with you?!”
This feels to the child as being shamed and criticized about the core of who they perceive themselves to be, so again the “I am not good enough” wound is born. Likely the story the child makes up to make sense of it is “people don’t like me when I’m myself”.
These wounds and stories are deep in our subconscious and feel very much like the truth. With work and support though, it is possible to bring the event into consciousness, soothe the inner child within, and in doing so, release the trapped energy the emotion is causing.
Once this process is conscious, you are able to get clarity on the real truth with your adult mind, that a difficult thing happened, but it never had anything to do with your self-worth.
The release I personally experienced, and now get to see in individuals while coaching them, is truly a sacred and beautiful thing to be a part of.
In private soul sessions, I guide you through the process of how to access this part of you, rediscover what lights you up, and what is holding you back, all with Divine guidance and intuitive insight.
I have also developed this low cost work-shop to guide you through how to connect with your inner child, and support your healing, in connection with your Source at home – check it out here. https://joannapeters.com/products-and-services-inner-child-connection/
Reach out with any questions or insights to firstname.lastname@example.org. (Seriously, I love to hear from my soul sisters!).
I’m rooting for you!
PS: Remember, I can ‘see’ and feel other peoples’ unhealed inner child wounds, so if you want guided healing and support at any time, reach out.